Please join me in remembering a great icon of the
entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died
yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from
repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.
Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of
celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs.
Butterworth, Hungry Jack, The California Raisins, Betty
Crocker, The Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The
grave was piled high with flour.
Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described
Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded.
Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but later life
was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very
smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked
schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times he still was
a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model
for millions.
Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children,
John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He
is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The
funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.
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